The truth

One of the values kids are taught at a young age is to tell the truth. The same was with my family. My mom was very strict about me and my sister telling truth. She used to say, “No matter what you have done, always tell the truth. It is much easier and it’s always, always the better option.”

In my childhood I was naughty kid. I used to get into trouble every day. As I started growing up, it continued, but the naughty turned into something else when I saw kids at my school wear new clothes, buy new things.

Every time I used to see my friend buy new things I wanted it. It wasn’t like I was obsessed about it, but I wanted it. What I dint know at that time is that there was one thing that would grow into an obsession.

It was the year 2000 and computer games had just made its way into my small hometown of Coorg, Madikeri. Everybody was playing. Kids, adults, you name it they were playing it. I so, so, so wanted to play them as everyone in our school was describing how amazing it was.

I had just passed out my junior high and entered my high school. My dad had given me 20 bucks on passing the exams. I took the money and ran to the cyber café to play the games with my friends.

I dint know squat about computer games. My friends cheated and played with my money for 2 hours, leaving me bitterly angry and unsatisfied. I said to myself, ‘I will play games all by myself without anybody’s help’, and that’s what I exactly did. The feeling I used to get when I played the games was amazing. Just like the feeling I used to get when i drank juice made from Kissan squashes; 100% real and amazing.

I was addicted and spent all the money I had on the computer games. Times were not as expensive as it is now. I used to get 5 bucks every week as pocket money, lesser sometimes. As we had our own shop, every time I used to ask my dad for more money, he used to say “When you have everything here, what do you need money for? If you want something I will buy it for you.”

I couldn’t stand it. I wanted to play computer games and that was it. My dad wasn’t so rich that he’d buy me a computer, so I thought of a plan. Every time I was home after school my dad used to make me sit in the shop and go for a coffee break for 10 minutes. I hated sitting at the shop, but I did it anyway because I wanted my dad to rest.

One day as I was sitting, minding the shop, my eyes fell on the cash register. I saw the money my dad had made the whole day. There were a couple of 20’s, 50’s and a lot of 10’s. I saw how my friends looked at me when I played the games. I was good, not just good, I was goooood. We competed in car races and I always own. I wanted to maintain that winning streak and so I took two 10 rupee notes from the register.

As soon as I had the money in my hand I started panicking. I thought, ‘Will I get caught?’, ‘What if dad comes to know about the missing money?’, ‘What would happen if I get caught?’ A hundred questions crossed my mind. I was sweating and put the money back. I saw my dad come in. He saw me, smiled and said to go play outside. I went.

The thought never left me. My mind said ‘You could have just taken the money and left, dad wouldn’t know!’ I said to myself ‘No I can’t do it. It would be stealing and then if he asks me, I’d have to lie. I don’t wanna do that.’ There was no voice for some time, but as the evening progressed the thought never left my mind.

I met my friends next week and as I hadn’t played the games for a week, I was sloppy. I lost all games and I was angry at myself. I said to myself “Enough is enough, I am a winner and that’s what I will be.”

I went to my dad and said “I want money to play computer games!”

He said “You play a lot of games thousif; no you can’t have more money. Your grades will go down, sit and study rather than playing games".

I was pissed. I was so pissed that I when my dad went for his break that day, I took two 20 rupees notes without a guilty conscience. I went and played games without a worry in the world.

My dad didn’t suspect a thing, so I started taking money every day. What started with 40 bucks soon grew 50, 60 and more. Whatever I dint spend on the computer games I used to save up.

After 3 years I had collected a lot of money. Yes, 3 years; 3 freaking years. I would have continued if it wasn’t for my sister.

One of the saddest things in my life was my sister’s death. That event led to everyone in our house become zombies for weeks. I used to fight with my sister a lot and when she passed away I blamed myself for not asking sorry. Remembering her I used to cry on my mother’s shoulder and howl with pain, asking my sister to forgive me. It was normal childhood fights, but the pain of not getting to ask sorry was real and hurt every day.

As I was crying one day, I remembered what I had been doing for the past 3 years. I felt ashamed and I wanted to say it to my parents. But my ego dint let me. I was very afraid thinking what my dad would say, but the guilt was eating me out. I stopped taking the money, but I had the money I had saved. I may have had like 10,000 bucks with me. I wanted to put it all back, but my dad would ask ‘Where did all the money come from?’ and I would have no answer.

I wanted to say the truth and now I couldn’t. I was in agony. I felt like I was on fire, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.

One day I fought with my mom. It was a bitter fight. She was crying and I was still angry. Suddenly I saw the picture of my sister on the table and I felt pain. I thought how I used to fight with her and now I had done the same with my mother. An inner voice told me ‘See thousif, you can’t ask sorry for the bad times you had with your sister, but you can set things right by asking sorry with your mother and telling her the truth’

I remembered what my mom used to say ‘Say the truth, no matter what.’ I went to where my mom was silently sobbing. I saw her, went near her, held her hand and let her to my bedroom. I sat down and said “I am really sorry mom” She stopped crying and saw me. I said how sorry I was for being such an arrogant child, and that I was sorry for all the bad things I had done in my life. She said that I wasn’t a bad kid, only a little stubborn sometimes but that was ok. I dint listen to her. I had taken a decision and I would abide to it.

I started talking about my sister and said how sorry I was for fighting with her and how sorry I was for fighting with my mom. I started crying, i was hysterical, like I couldn’t stop myself. It was 10 in the night and listening to my crying my dad silently came from the shop and stood near the door. I started crying, asking sorry and cried some more. My dad came near me and seeing him I just broke down. I wanted to confess and finally I thought it was now or never and I did it.

I said how I had started taking money and how I spent it on computer games and how I had saved some of it. I took a long time to confess and when I had finally finished my dad said only one thing “I knew.”

I looked at him and he hugged me and said “I knew about it, but I wanted you to stop it by yourself.” “You took a long time to stop, saved up a lot of money, but you did it.” he said smiling. I blurted out a laugh and looked at my mom. She came forward and hugged me and said smilingly “I knew too” I looked at her and tears flowed again. “Don’t cry” she said “I know you lied to us, but you taking initiating and confessing you did something wrong and admitting it is a huge thing.” I heard her say this and cried some more.

“Stop crying my child” my mother said hugging me tighter “You took a big step and see now we know you will never do it” she added.

I looked into her eyes and knew that I had cleansed my sins through the tears I cried. My parents rather than being angry were happy that I had realised my mistake. Both my parents got up from my bed and my dad took my chin into his hands and said smilingly “If you ever need money just ask thousif, everything me and your mother earn is for you itself. It always has been.”

That moment was real for me. More real than anything I had experienced in my life, ever. I learnt that whatever happens in life my parents will always be there for me. It made me feel so good to tell the truth. It made me and my parents grow stronger as a family and since then I haven’t taken a single rupee without asking.

That day I learnt that truth no matter how hurtful it is, is always a beautiful thing to say. I learnt that the real thing to have is a family that trusts you, no matter what you have done. It made me feel that saying the truth will always be better than telling lies. It’s your family that counts, the trust they have in you that counts. Lie never mattered and never will. I had their trust and from that day till now I have honoured that trust, always will.

This post has been written for 'The Kissan 100% Real Blogger Contest' on Indiblogger.in.

The Intelligence Concept

“Let’s go to mall…..” exclaimed my cousin Sam jumping up from the Divan he was lazing on "And do what, just browse the new products and come back empty handed!!” I replied
“Not exactly, we could buy a packet of Act 2 popcorn” he said
“That’s what we always do to save face….” I replied a little loud.

It was Sunday evening and I had nothing else to do, so just like teenagers (who are not teenagers anymore) we were watching reruns of Baywatch Hawaii. And frankly I was getting tired of the ‘only-girls no-story’ thing
I threw my glance around and found the newspaper lying beside me; I picked it up and saw an AD

The whole AD was in bright yellow with some little black words thrown in
“Why did god even make a color like yellow.. Uh…It’s above me” said EVIL M “Pun intended”.
I ignored the comment and took a closer look at the AD
It was from a clothes showroom named F square. The offer was

‘Sell your old clothes to us. Jeans for 400, T-shirts for 100, Shirts for 150’ conditions apply
I ignored the very very small fine print named conditions apply and thought

Hey that’s not a bad deal, I have some old jeans which I don’t wear, and a couple of very bright green T-shirts which I could give away “Don’t remind of those T shirts, they are like radium tombstones on a moonless night, why in god’s name did you even buy them?” asked EVIL M.
“Because I thought, at least that might attract girls” I replied
“They got attracted all right… to other boys” he replied laughing.
I got up from the divan to take a look into my closet and it was not a pretty sight.

Let me give you a description of my closet. I have 2 compartments where I keep my clothes, and they have everything, Besides Clothes there are socks, belts, caps, sweaters, baniyan’s and god knows what.
I mean there’s everything stuffed into those two compartments without any mercy (Don’t worry, I have separate place for my shoes ;)) When one sees it, they get the impression like each piece of garment is hugging another, just so that it doesn’t fall out of the closet.
In simple words it’s a typical guy’s closet. I searched for the old clothes and took them out. I looked at the Green T’s, one is a bearable color, when I took the other one out EVIL M said “Where are those sunglasses, Its hurting my eyes”
I looked at the Brand new Levi’s T shirt which I had worn only once, bought some 2 years back. It was good but it had 2 problems

One. It was extremely bright
Two. It was extremely short.

“Try it on once” said EVIL M. I tried it on and the T stopped just above my belly. Sam’s mobile just rang with its ringtone of the song ‘Belly Dancer’.
“Purrfect” purred EVIL M “Shake that ass now….” He laughed and sang along with the song.

I took out the shirt and then took a count of how many old clothes I had at that moment.
4 pairs of jeans and 2 shirts, I told the offer to my T.A bhabi and she searched my Bhai Riz’s closet and found a pair of jeans and a shirt, which she added to my collection.

Sam looked at me and said “Let’s be thoughtful for a minute here, we don’t know what the conditions of this offer are, you wanna take all these clothes at once?”
I was shell shocked when he said that, a guy who comes running to me wearing underwear, and exposing bellies, telling me to be ‘thoughtful’. That was like saying a blonde had won a noble prize.

But digesting that ‘thought’ I replied “Why not, we can sell these and get new ones from there itself, It would save a heck load of money, and I heard they have international brands such as Mark Taylor, Lacoste and all, It’s gonna be fun”.
“You have no idea how much….” replied EVIL M smiling a wicked smile
I knew I had to think at those thoughts of M but the offer was too good, so I went with my ‘better’ thoughts. Sam looking at the clothes bundle said “At least put those in your college bag”
“Why?” I asked
“Because it would be easy to carry, and there would be no embarrassment involved if the offer involves paying money” he replied
Point. I thought and packed all the clothes into the bag and pulled it over my shoulders, it was like pulling up a fat kid who had just eaten a hearty lunch. “Man this is heavy” I said.
“Ha ha you have no idea how heavy its gonna become” replied EVIL M smiling again

We got on a bus and reached the place, on the way I said “I also wanna buy an I-pod, so after this we will go to KT Street and get it OK”
“Yeah sure” he said

We went into the showroom, “First ask about the conditions, only then start opening your Potli (Bundle)” he had informed me while on the bus.

I browsed some T-shirts while Sam did the same, I then slowly walked to the sales guy and said “I saw the AD in the newspaper about the offer in your shop, can you tell me if there are any conditions towards it?”
“Yes sir, there is only one condition, for the amount of old clothes that you bring to us, you have to buy clothes costing 5 times more than that” he replied with a smile
“‘Service’ with a smile just got a whole new meaning” replied EVIL M “And oh yeah… pun intended, My own kinda pun of course” he said and started laughing.

I mentally calculated the price of my old clothes. 5 jeans amounting 2000 rupees, with a 2 T’s of hundred each and a shirt of 150, roughly making up to 2500 rupees. I was shocked, so shocked that there was release of adrenaline in my body, I calculated again, so that means I have to buy clothes worth 10 thousand rupees.(Stingy guy-10thousand bucks, you do the math ;))

EVIL M started laughing again, and it was just the start. I smiled at the sales guy and tuned towards Sam. He looked at my face and knew everything in a second, as he saw the monkey like fake smile on my face.(All this time, I was carrying the heavy bag mind you)
We talked and Sam asked “You got 10 thousand bucks…….”
“Only if you sell my kidney at a discount…..” I snapped
“Let’s get out then” he replied. I started browsing the T-shirts again and then amped my voice so that the sales guy could hear me, and said to Sam “These are all the same colors I have at home, you want anything?”
He shook his head; I asked the cliqued-customer-question to the sales guy “When will the new stock arrive?”
He gave the same cliqued-sales guy-answer “After 2 days”
We saw the opportunity and slipped out slowly.

I heard a laugh, it started out slow and then filled my whole head. It was EVIL M
He was laughing so hard I thought my brain would blow out. The monstrous weight of the bag on my shoulders and his laughing made for a deadly combination, and from the corner of my eye I even saw Sam laughing.
“It’s better than your belly dancing episode” I said.
“Yeah right” he replied laughing again.
We walked some more “At least carry this bag for some time” I pleaded with Sam
“Your ‘offer’, your weight. You wouldn’t have let me touch those new clothes if you had got them, Carry it yourself” he ordered.
I said “Atleast lets go search for the I-pod”, he agreed and we went I-pod hunting and that’s where the real trouble started.

I wanted a 2 GB I-pod costing no more than 1500 bucks and I specifically wanted a branded one, in specific it was a Sony or a Transcend.(Dream boy dream you would say, But hear me out ;))

We started searching at an electronic shop junction named KT Street which was a kilometer away from F square. We searched in more than 20 shops and in every shop the price range was 1900, but my friend had got one for 1500, so I dint wanna pay more.

We searched and searched to no avail, even a dealer of transcend electronics said “If you find a 2 GB model for less than 1500, order a hundred for me will you?”. I moved out of the shop smiling an embarrassed smile.
I was carrying that bag all this time and my shoulders hurt like hell, EVIL M and Sam were laughing in unison, I thought, ‘are these guys connected through some telepathic non sense?’, more laughter.

I was cursing myself, and then I remembered something, couple of weeks earlier I had gone to a computer dealer where my friend had a brought a new computer. When I had asked the dealer for the price of a Transcend I-pod, he had said “It’s 1500”
I asked EVIL M “Now you’re telling me this….”
“What fun would it be, if I had said that to you earlier” he replied laughing

I pulled Sam and told him about the shop and we started walking, it was some 1 and half kilometers away. In the heat of the night (its summer remember) and with no water in sight, I was sweating, sweating like a pig. I begged again to Sam to carry the bag and he rejected me outright.

We walked and finally reached the place, I enquired about the I-pod and the guy said “The price has gone up”
“How much?” I said
“A hundred bucks” he replied. I agreed, he went into the supply room and when he got back he said “Sorry, No stock.

All that walking, all that carrying, all that searching leading to this I thought, EVIL M and Sam were laughing like monkeys gone wild, I slowly came out of the store and started walking towards the bus stand.
“Man I haven’t had so much fun, since the last time when that girl kicked you in the shin when you were in 5^th standard” said EVIL M laughing.

I was still sweating; Sam said he would be going to a friend’s house and left me. I got on the bus and as the cold air washed through my face. I just had one thought. “Don’t ever try to be cheap, it’s gonna cost you more than you think.” And I have stopped being cheap. (No pun intended ;)) and so I have been feasting on 6 rupees cup ice cream thrice in a week now, not daily because I am not that rich ;).
And now I take a couple of minutes to seriously think whenever EVIL M says “Trust me….It will be so much fun…”.

Till next time.... Have fun guys ;)

The F.I.R Adventure

What is that one part of human life that a person will never forget in his entire life?,

Marriage..? (I guess men would never accept that :P) Your first kiss, ah... how can one forget that, but err… lets not stray away from the subject shall we…Lemme say the answer myself (As alwayz :P),

Its college life.

Because that is the place where you “mature” (In you thinking that is :P), you find friends who will stay with you throughout your whole life, where we live to learn a new “experience” everyday, and it was just the same for me.

When I was studying for my degree, I thought this life and I am so lucky to have it, I had tons of fun, messed around (Studied a bit too ;)), and got through with (Not so) flying colors.

When degree came to an end, I said to myself, “That’s it Thousif bhai, Time to get serious about life”. I guess god heard the disappointment in my voice that day, so he decided to extend my ‘happiness’ a bit more, and I came to Mysore to pursue my masters in journalism.

Coming from a small town, the new city gave me experiences I had never had, it gave me sense of freedom never attained before, and I found a new me…

From wearing a Saree, to jumping in to a lake half naked (even if there were girls looking around :P), From creating waves in panel discussions (As I was the only English talking kid in the group) to winning prizes in fests (even though it was just a 3^rd :P), and to say that I am just getting started, makes it all the more lovely…

Looking at it you might be thinking studying might have taken a backseat, but that is where the real fun is, oh.. the sleeping in back avoiding the lecturer’s eyes(that too in the 1^st period :P), the passing of comments and jokes, it’s even more fun than my degree, If you thought people doing masters are ‘respectable and disciplined’, you have to think again if you saw me with my pals.

The exploits are many but I am gonna share a new one with you, which showed me a side of law never seen before.

Couple of months ago, our Reporting ma’am ‘M’ had said for the practical record, we have to Procure F.I.R’s of 2 crime cases and one accident case, let me say in her words exactly as to how we were to do it:

“I want the reports first hand, if you see a crime and can report it, that would be great, but if you think you are one of gandhi’s monkey and can’t see a crime going on, then go to a police station and look into the F.I.R’s and copy them, same applies for accident cases, and for the interview assignment, I want you reporting some big shot. Ok”

When she said those words I was surprised so much that I fainted, when I got up in the hospital, all my classmates were beside me with a notepad in their hands asking questions, so that they could report about the ‘accident’. :P

Ok that was a lie, but still it surprised me, as I was from management background I had absolutely no idea how to do it, and I was thinking interviewing might be easy, but F.I.R’s how am I gonna get those? (I was a small town boy in a big strange city you see ;)), When I was talking on phone with my dad one day, the matter came up and he said “No problem beta(son), You come here, and I will arrange them for you”

I was so relived and when I came to my place dad took me to the police station, and that was where the real ‘Experience’ began.

Lemme explain there are 2 police stations in out place, City and Rural, we first went to city police station expecting that we would find the reports there, but a couple of constables there said,

“You won’t find them so easily, first you have to write an application to the sub inspector, and only if he gives permission you can access them, but in addition you have to pay a bank challan of 21rs each for an F.I.R, and we don’t have accident F.I.R’s here so you better go to the rural police station”.

That’s not so tough I thought, and we both went to the rural police station and gave the application to the sub inspector, his words shocked me

“Well it’s not a child’s play kid, we just cannot give FIR reports to anyone” he said mocking me

I said “Sir I am doing masters in journalism, and I want it for my record work, nothing else”

“But I can’t….” he said with a mischievous grin, I was like why is he acting like that, when he can give it, does he want us to plead? Just as I was thinking that, when my dad suddenly barged in and said
“It’s just for his studies; please, If you could help out it would be helpful for him”.

“Hmmmm……… ok” he said seeing my dad pleading, I got furious seeing the inspector’s change, but I kept silent, he then ringed the bell for the constable to come in, and said “Call the F.I.R handler”.

“The constable said “He has gone for lunch Sir”

“You better wait” said the inspector pointing to us…

We waited, and it was 3 pm, we haven’t even had lunch, we asked the constable at what time he would be back and he said that he had gone at 2.30 and will be only returning at around 4.

“Lunch for that long…?” I said,

“Government officials what can you say”, my dad said sarcastically, as there was an hour we thought of going back to home have lunch and get back, on my way I asked dad: “When he was going to give us the reports anyway, at first why did he deny?, and why was he talking to me like a +12 student, when he knew I was a PG student?”

My dad replied coolly “He is a police officer beta, he wants to show he has the power, that he controls, and only if he agrees our work can be done” hearing him I was like, what has the world come to.

We got back at 3.30, the F.I.R handler hadn’t been back, we waited, bless that day for sehwag was playing brilliantly, I and my dad watched him hit a double century in the police station, but power went off and we waited, time raced to 4 and then to 4.30 still he wasn’t there, at that time the constable felt pity on us and said “well I guess he will be late, so let me just show you about how F.I.R’s actually are”

He was very helpful and showed me how they were, at 5.15 the handler finally came

He asked “Which crime cases do you want?” just like a salesman asking at a mall

As I hadn’t committed many crimes in my life (Besides stealing and lying in my childhood :P), I was thinking..

While my dad acting like a perfect customer said “Oji… koi bhi dedo, jaise ki murder, half-murder, ya phir…. attempt to murder…..” (Give any.. like murder, half-murder or attempt to murder) he was only asking about murder cases, I saw the handler’s face and it gave an expression which comes when a kid asks for adult magazines in a store, I couldn’t help but let out a short laugh (just like in the picture :P)

The surprised officer then said “Err.. We cannot give murder cases just like that, but here are some missing persons F.I.R’s”

I was excited and started taking them, but a bulb glowed (yes it’s THE bulb :P) in my head and I said to myself “missing people… that is not actually a crime…. is it?”(I would be a great journalist na.. :P)

I quickly thought and said to him “Missing person is not actually a crime, do you have kidnapping, theft or something like that?”

He finally pulled out a theft and a murder (yeah he gave one by my dad’s pressure :P) and a accident F.I.R report… I quickly went in to Xerox them…. 2 were over while power went again while doing the 3^rd one… I knew I couldn’t count on power, so I sat down to copy them on paper, I had to catch a bus so that I could come to class the next day and it was getting late…… finally when I finished it writing in my beautiful (Read: Hopeless) handwriting, guess what, power came… we got another copy and when we went to return them, the F.I.R’s the handler said

“Why so late, I thought you ran away or something….”

“Well we dint knew 5 minutes were so important to you sir, we are extremely sorry”, my dad said sarcastically, and I was all smiles :)

And the biggest happiness came in the form that, no one took a bribe to do the work... Hurray :P

Well that’s the story about how I had a brush with the of law and got the F.I.R’s, but the interview is still up for grabs… if anybody of you are world famous in India, or if you can find someone famous (not your dog or watchman :P)… do tell me, let’s see what happens there….

Till next time, have an awesome (and a crime free :)) weekend. Take care……

The man of this country that has come to become.......

'World is a place where man is the king and women is never the queen', thats how exactly what a man describes of a woman, and he is true when he says this because when a woman has power to become a king, why should she be a queen???Lemme exactly tell you how a man of this country thinks about a woman.......

Last Monday there was seminar held by our department, in there was a topic, Media and women. A lady named Poornima(She is the news head Of A.I.R in Bengaluru) spoke on this, she spoke about how media sometimes uses some situations like sexual harassment just for their own use, without the least bit concern about the women victims, reporters asking personal questions, questions that are unnecessary and irrelevant... she explained how media can do better, and also questioned that why women just have 33% quota in this country? And they should demand 50% in every aspect... I really liked the way she spoke, because it showed what women's problem's were and how they could be solved.

But one person broke my happy bubble, and it was senior of my college named 'G'(Read:Goofball), in the Q&A session, he said “Women just need not say, but they need to fight for the 50% quota that they demand for themselves”.

I was telling myself, “Thats what the women have been fighting for from the time we got independence, and even that 33% is not given accordingly, and this guy is saying fight for 50%.... WTH”, but I got furious when he said “Its not just women who are harassed, men also get harassed and exploited at work place, and how the dowry act is being misused and how many men are suffering due to this”, and people were clapping listening to this.

I was like what the fuc* are you talking about dude, men getting harassed and exploited!!, yeah maybe they are getting “exploited”, but is it really the case ??, is it more important than the problems, the women of today are facing, from fear of sexual harassment to rape, she lives in fear everyday,

The seminar got over and I was boiling with anger inside, due to some other things I couldn't say the same with the senior,(I dint even wanna see his face), but the real shocker came when I discussed this with my friend Maddy.

He was also the typical man saying, “Men are getting exploited and facing problems due to women, who are misusing the dowry act and blaming, my husband is demanding dowry, and making them face punishment”

I said “Ok that's one, but what are the other problems?”

He was mum, I then said “Do you know every day a woman lives in fear, from her birth to her death there are so many battles she fights and struggles to achieve to make a place for herself in the society, do you know how much pain she endures everyday?, how many sacrifices she has to make?”

He said “But still there are crimes going on men that needs attention too about how much he is suffering...”, I couldn't believe my ears when I heard this,

I replied “Why aren't you looking at the bigger picture here!!, there are more crimes going on women in a single minute, than that are are going on men in a whole year, and is it really more painful for a man to live by than, or for that woman, who gets exploited or harassed every day, and lives her whole life cursing with guilt that she shouldn't have born a women at all!!”

He seemed to understand this and agreed with me, and when I discussed the same with my brother, he to was pro man, and only when I said look at the bigger picture did he too finally understand.

I mean I don't understand, I never heard a man scream, “I got exploited today, I shouldn't have been born as a man itself”, while there is so much agony and pain in a voice of women when she says “I shouldn't have been born a woman”, I just pray that men start looking at the bigger picture than screaming next time “Men are also exploited....”.

Peace, Frustration, Anger and a lil of WTF-Part 2

Amidst all the chaos happening due to floods in 2 states in the past week (i.e Andhra and Karnataka), there is one thing that is going on which needs more attention, No its not the politicians eating up fund money, that will come later, its what the “government”(if you can call that...), has provided for the flood victims.

The central government has done an air survey of the damage occurred, and the official reports state that the damage was more than 16500 crore rupees in karnataka, guess how much the “government” has provided, just fifty two crores, I just couldn't believe it, WTF yaar??, I guess the quote “what you see, is what you get” got a whole new meaning na??.

I was not bothered by it that much, I just thought “Fuc*ing political game play”, but when I looked at a newspaper, where they had said about the resources alloted for 2 states, I got so angry that I tore the newspaper(what else I could do?? :P)

Just look at the list an you will know for yourselves.

Resources alloted:

For Andhra
714 NDRF personnel
235 Motor boats
310 Life saving Rings
655(225+430) Life Jackets
700 Army Personnel
23 Special Boats
11 Boat Motors
11 Navy Rescue Squads

For Karnataka
12 Special Navy Boats
6 Boat Motors
200 Life Jackets
4 Dive Squad
Group of 22 Emergency Personnel

Before you say I am regionalist or something like that, lemme clear it out, I am NOT. I just want you to know the discrimination that has been going on, looking at the list its just like, a sackful for Andhra, and a handful for karnataka. It just goes to show that in the political game play that goes on, its the common man who ends up suffering the most.

I know in andhra the destruction is more than that of karnataka, but that doesn't men, here nothing happened, people are dying by the day because of less resources, and when I am getting so angry, think about the victims how they might be feeling being in the situation.....

Its the freakin same, when congress was the ruling party in karnataka, and BJP was in the centre, the famine problem came up, and they sanctioned so less, that it wasn't even seen by the needy, because the politicians only ate that up, and now when BJP is in state and congress in centre, the flood problem has come in, history gets repeated, AGAIN. At least this time people of the state itself are coming forward to give the money, and more than 500 crores were collected in just 24 hours, when karnataka state CM yediyurappa decided to do a road rally to collect the money, I really appreciate him for that.

I know more than 60% of the funds will be gulped down by the greedy bureaucrats itself, but at least something will reach the needy, so that they can get back to their lives, thats the only ray of light (if you can call that one).

Greedy becoming fat everyday, help not reaching the needy, I mean WTF is wrong with these people......, I don't know when the situation will improve, when the “government” will think, when a disaster strikes to 2 or more states, you don't look at the ruling party, but at the suffering people, and think all states are equal, and we should allot resources as per the need, so that the victims will get the help which they deserve. Until then I guess there will be more chaos than the disaster itself.... Shit and WTF is all I can say......

A Little Consience Clearing Session

I wore my first “Armani” T-shirt when I was in my 8^th standard, and everyone was totally impressed seeing me in school, I took in the moment though I never told them that it was fake :P and it had just cost me 80 bucks at that time :P

Well life is sometimes like that isn't it?, when you get praise for something that you don't deserve, you stealthily take it, As much as you conscience tells you to tell the truth, your tongue just doesn't let it. An age old favorite “Quote” of my friend comes to my mind “Free ka maal babuji ka maal”.

I have passed with the exact situation a couple of times, where I have took in praise for free, without actually deserving it, I wanted to tell them that its not true and sometimes have even told them, but they are so adamant that they wont believe me, it makes me feel guilty that I am stealing something that is not my own. And it hurts, not much, but just a little, like a thorn stuck in your finger, the pain is not much but still its nags you real bad, and till that thorn is out of your hand you are not at peace.

Well as the name of the post suggests I am here for a lil conscience cleaning session, well the secrets that I am about to let out may seem down right silly, I can already see your answer after reading the post saying “Dude thats not even a secret, you are just being silly”, well maybe I am, but I somehow today I felt that I should clear out a couple of secrets, so here goes......

The one thing that has always nagged me and still sometimes does is that, when my family thinks I am a Big Computer geek, they think I am the Mahamahim of computers or something like that, and always praise me and say “Thousif, Ah he is a wizard with computers” and when I promptly say that I am nothing of sorts and that I just know the basics, they don't believe me itself and say “Oh Thousi stop being so modest, you know you are too good at it”, if only they knew the truth that I couldn't even pass my basic C programming practical exams (That computer language went straight over my head, rather going into it :P), I was like the least scoring student in computers, and when I tried saying I am more interested in writing i.e Novel writing and short stories, they were like “That doesn't have a definite future where as this does Thousif, so concentrate upon this”.

When I flunked in my science Exams in my 10+2 which included failing in Physics, Chemistry, Mathematics (You must be wondering how I passed my degree right? :P) but miraculously I had passed in my Computer science subject, and that made their belief more strong that indeed I was a “Wizard”

My god they told me every time when they caught hold of me, that “You should join Jet king”, “you should join IIHT, it will make a future to you”, as much I tried to convince them they were adamant, but due to my so called satyagraha's I finally made them realize that I was more into writing than the computer world, so they let me pursue my dream, but still the belief remains that I am “Computer Wizard”, and I just take in the praise with out actually deserving it.

Another was when they said “He cares about you, But talks a lil less thats it”, truth was I never really cared, the reason for that was, my so called relatives were only interested in gossip, ughh I hate that word itself, even when I wanted to to tell them I am not interested, my cousin sisters were like, “listen to this, that girl in my class is a total bitch blah blah blah, that guy is so hot blah blah blah” and I had to pretend that I cared because they would literally tie me to chair and make me listen, oh the torture, when I tried to say I just don't give a damn, they would get all teary eyed and would say “You don't care about us na” and as I hate tears I was forced to so “I was just kidding ya” with a fake smile of course and they would say “How sweet of you, you really care about us na” and I was like..... you can guess right..... :P

Well even till today the “whiz” and the “you care about me(Read:Gossip)” comment goes on and I just take the “praise”, I don't know how much more I can take it, and I cant even open my mouth also, because if I do they will get hurt, damn that thorn hurts, hmm lets see when I will find a nail cutter to pick it out.

Wanna help me out on this?, or blast me with your comments, you are most welcome :)

P.S: If you think this post resembles choco's writing, i am missing her posts so that might be it ;)

Till next time this is the “Whiz kid” signing out. Peace. :)