The Brand New Bangalore Kid

Somewhere in a far off village in India, where the power comes once a week and internet connection only lasts for 10-15 minutes. There are 2 girls speaking to each other about a unique phenomenon.

Girl 1: (Whispering) I heard he is coming back.

Girl 2: Are you sure?. I thought it was a myth. He has been silent for so many months I highly doubt that he is even alive!

Girl 1: He always comes back from the dead don’t you know?!... He is the only reason I even have an internet connection in this god forsaken village. His blog posts are like the breath of fresh air. It livens me up from inside. They are… my way of life…

Girl 2: (Getting jealous): Yeah it is, but he is my way of life too, his writings, makes me laugh so much. I sometimes fantasize about him when I am with my boyfriend.. God.. His writings are so cool and amazing… I wonder how he is in person!!

Girl 1: I hear he is amazing, so hot, and handsome. The only sad part is he has been away for so long that I miss him so much, SO MUCH…..(breaks down in tears)

Girl 2: Don’t cry, he will be back… for the love of all his readers (secretly points towards self). He has to be back…

For your reference EVIL M is my EVIL MIND(EVIL M: Hell Yeah :P)

The sound of farting come from a far of background, as the laziest person in earth gets up from his sleep. BRRRRRRRRR..

EVIL M: (Are taliyaan to maro… Evil M is back :P) What the F is this Thousif, every morning? Every morning… sheesh

Me: Kya karoon yaar… acidity hai…

EVIL M: That’s what happens when you eat outside always, not eating on proper time, hmph I am fed up of your stomach and its rear exhaust.. Sheesh. Anyway.. what is the plan for today, besides going for work?

Me: Have to write a blog post.

EVIL M: DON’T YOU F**ING KID ME MAN, DON’T YOU F***ING DARE!!!!.

Me: Wo wo wo, whats up with all the rage?,

Evil M: do you even know when u visited your ‘soul space’ haan? Do u?

Me: What?? It has been like 2 months?!!

Evil M: 2 months… 2 freaking months… do u have any respect for yourself!!! Sheesh… Even FU seems like praise… god you are so lazy

Me: Hey, I wasn’t lazy ok, I work every day!!!

Evil M: Everybody works ok!!!, look at remya… that girl is so passionate about her life and blog, look at suruchi… my god that woman… she has a child, a husband to take care of and she teaches too!!, and she updates regularly.. What the hell is wrong with u, itna bhi to kaam nahi hai na?

Me: yes man, I feel bad

Evil M: You should be ashamed, people love you so much, those 2 girls in that far off village, quarrel with their boyfriends every day, fantasizing about you, unke liye to blog likh…

Me: hmph you are rgt…. I should write, and I will write a blog post rgt now…

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

Me: Oh shit yaar, bathroom jaana padega!!! Kal likhta hoon

EVIL M: !!#!%&&*$*$*%#&% wait!! Did I just praise him? That Ass****.

Hey guys hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. (Dodges shoes thrown by, Arpit, Arpitha, Charu, Suruchi, Akki, and some other loyal followers) arey, marte kyun ho yaar!!! Aa gaya na!!

Arpit: (In blind Rage) Haramzade!!!, ab aaya hai ab??…2 mahino ke baad!!

ME: Arey arpit chill yaar, itna kyun gussa ho raha hai?

Arpit: Gussa na hun to kya karoon, kahaan hai meri gifts, kahaan hai mere awards? Is saal ke RAZA awards ko kya huwa?

Me: Wo funding may thoda problem ho gaya yaar, aur u know… Acidity problem!!!

Arpit: !#!$%#@^!^^%&

EVIL M: @#%$!#@%!#^!^

Thousif’s mother comes from the kitchen..

Mom: “Ya mere Allah, THOUSIF!!!, how much more will you swear in this beautiful house of mine, and make it dirty than a filthy pig sty.. What is wrong with you and that stupid friend of your’s….”

Arpit runs outs my house like his ass is on fire… there’s even some smoke like thing left behind… *maybe he farted*

ANYYYYYYYYYYHOOOOOOOOOOO… getting back to the issue… I am back yes I am, so let me tell you what I have been upto :)

I am now a trainee copywriter at Rediffsuion-Wunderman… and the job is amazing here…

First time I am all on my own in life, from making food to cleaning toilets and it has never been so eventful before, so many experiences. SO MANY and my god, it’s barely been a month… I thought I will feel alone in this lonely city, where everyone just runs after money and fame. I thought it dint have a soul at all, people would be self-centered. But I got a BIG sucker punch to my stomach.. This city is actually beautiful. It has its own personality, and it’s amazing.

Let me tell you how, first week out, I went to see Transformers 3 with some frenz of chavan(my roommate) the film was amazing (my first 3D film :D) and then we went to a pub.. I dint drink though!!

Evil M: Daddy’s lil girl he is toh, doesn’t drink, doesn’t smoke, I donno why he even lives his life…

ME: I live for the beauty of life ok, life is not all about boozing and smoking!!!

EVIL M: yeah rgt…. Anyways… please continue your gun gyaan :P

ME: I don’t need your approval..

EVIL M: !~!@$%!#%$^^^

Mom : THOUSIF!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT DID I SAY ABT THE LANGUAGE???!!!

EVIL M: Muhuhahahahaha

Evil to evil he rahega… anyways I went with them to the pub…

EVIL M: and they raped him…. Ha ha ha

ME: WTFF (i.e. what the f**ing F), that’s not what happened….

EVIL M: (sings in a 1950’s tune) Ram teri ganga maili ho gayeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Ho gayeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :P

ME: oh my god, you are a nightmare… F*** U…

Evil M: (eerie static sound…..)

Thank god he is silent, so anyway we went to the pub, the guys ordered drinks, and when I said no to free booze…

Arpit: (jumps up from his bed) FREE BOOZE!!! OH MY GOD!!! Did someone say free booze… kahaan, where, tell me now!!!

ME: Arpit ji calm down… it’s here in Bangalore, and it wasn’t all free..

Arpit: (Inflates down like a sad balloon. purrrrrrrrrrrrrr :P)

So I said I don’t drink, and they respected me for it, they never forced even for second, except saying it tastes good, and making me feel like I was missing something good, at some points I wanted to try, but I have made a promise to someone, that I will not take any drugs of any sorts. So I wanted to keep that promise :). Not that I have drug abuse problems :P. just promised :)

EVIL M: that’s what all the drug abusers say :P

(Gives a stinky eye to EVIL M) But what followed in this session was, I felt the guys open up and talk about so many things.. The party which started with a PG rating soared onto XXX :P and what not… I have never laughed so much, I was so happy to be around… The feeling was so amazing, and I wasn’t even drunk :P

They kept asking me, am I enjoying myself?, you are not feeling bored? And were so caring, I loved the attention and at the same time saw them enjoying themselves, it was one of the best things I have ever been a part off…

I remember a joke from the night..

Chavan: how will you go back home man? What if the policeman catches you and asks you to walkin a straight line?

Sunil(one of the frenz): I’ll walk… I am good at walking on straight lines…(he sounded so drunk)

Chavan: (looking at others) This guys is so drunk, he will yell at the policeman saying… “Damn you man, first draw a straight line and then tell me to walk on it, drawing a crooked line and asking me to walk straight…what the hell is wrong with you, are you drunk?” :P

To top it off we went for a walk at 1 in the night and sat in front of Croma electronic store (no I am not getting paid to say that :P) and I just took a look at the city.. The guys were still laughing remembering some instances and I laughed with them.. I felt like I was always a part of their lives, and sitting there I felt like I am part of the city too… That day was amazing… it will always be in my memory, that when you are with Frenz nothing matters, and they became my frenz so quickly… In just a matter of hours I felt this instant connection with all four of them, I was so amazed, I loved it… it was so simple yet so very special, that just talking for a couple of hours could lead to something that is sooooo good. It made me see Bangalore, its culture, its people in a whole new way, and I loved it.

We are meeting again this weekend, and going to another pub, hope it is the same as last time, I know it will be :).

Well that just me giving an update… I have many more stories for you guys….

EVIL M: … from getting molested, to how he was ruthlessly beaten up with a slipper by a monkey… to letting out a loud fart in a very important business meeting… it’ll all come… don’t worry…

Well as EVIL M said… there are some things worth sharing… till then :) I love you all… have a very beautiful day ahead :)…..take care I have missed you all.. yes including those 2 girls :)… :).

P.S: A very special thank you for these people who would have kicked my ass, if I hadn’t wrote again and made me write these… Arpitha, Arpit, Suruchi, Anwesa, Viddhi, Remya, Saru(thank you for a very sweet email (*points fingers at other instructing a ‘see and learn gesture’:P*) and a couple other who’s names I forgot :P…. you guys are very special in my life… Thank you. Muaaaaaaaah (Dodges slippers thrown by you-know who ;)) bye guys :) :) love you….

i am back.. well sort of...

So i've got exams, that is like from 2 days from now.... so i wanna write many many(boring) new things but because i am so busy doing(lazy) things... i'll just stick to posting this poem which i wrote like a month ago... i just got up in the morning one day, took my pen and paper and started writing this poem, one my classmates said, its my best work till date :D, i was so happy... so here i present to you...

The Glories We Conquer

In the wake of the red mist, i open my eyes to see a flood

A flood of friends and foes scattered horrendously welcoming me. Lifeless

A second ago dying to open my eyes

Now only wishing if i were blind

A second ago what was filled with life

All now a proof of nightmares, A nightmare called death

The earth which smiled of a lively green

now only screams in the color of agony

The earth with a promise of warm sunshine

Now spews out a cold stench, reeking of bitterness and hatred

Perplexed, helpless, shocked i see

A sight which was never meant to be

The plants which once seeked water to flourish

Grow now with a taste of someone's life

A slow calm voice rises in my head

My mother teaching me when i was young

Every other man is your brother

I now in the distance see one, taking the life of another

Gathering the strength left in my arms, i stand up to a view of devastation

A moment of history made yesterday

A history no one will ever be proud of

I take a step forward and crush it into a stranger's eyes

The eyes which had dreamed of a son, growing now in his wife's womb

A son who will never see the shine

The shine of his father's green eyes

With another, i step onto a man's hands, breaking them. Forever

Hands which carried his daughter to school everyday, while he was home

Just like that i walk on,

from a warm place, where i took an oath to save every life,

to this wet place now, crushing and destroying dreams and memories

what starts as a walk, turns into a run. A run for my life

Falling into someone's arms which held life once,

to another's who always thought hatred was the answer

I cry now, breathing hard, cause i cant walk but crawl

So i crawl now, exhausted. My strength slipping down a stream of tears

Every movement i make, dragging me into a stench

A stench which seeps deep into my skin

Never to be washed of again

Crying, screaming and with utter despair

I reach the end of the sight

A sight no human should ever see

My mother waits for me in my distant home

Where she has promised me porridge, If i return home safe

Safe. A word me neither the world will ever believe in

Unwillingly and with an herculean attempt i pull myself up

to walk towards a will of mine, to live

A voice inside asking me just one question.................. "for what?"

Well, i know its a lil emotional, but don't be too sad cause i will be back to make u laugh sooooon... wish me that my exams go well, cause i haven't studied much(Read:Zilch :P) so... cya all soon. have a nice month ahead take care :)

P.S: This is my 75th post :D......sho happy :)

Some more emotions

I won’t be writing a blog post of evil m this week because I have exams.... so these are the 2 poems which i had written to help a friend for her competition. I donno if they won or not, because she is absconding after that :P, so here goes

Enjoy :)

Dreams

Born in me against my will
Those carved emotions.
With wings of a fresh butterfly
Pure as morning dew.

Breaking all barriers
An addiction.
To conquer, to achieve, to live.

I am unstoppable
A Dream chaser
Nothing to lose
I will be there soon.

Father

Grew up in your arms
Your warm shadow
Walks to school, and long rides on your back
I remember…

There you were every time
When my eyes searched for you
To support me,to guide me
You never let me down dad.

Oh how I remember your smile
When I wore my first pink gown
How you understood my silence, my little wishes
Dreams which i chased
On which they laughed
i found them
Turning true in your eyes
Angel you called me
But one you are
My first and best mate for life...

A huge thank you for Tulika who helped me with these poems, I just provided her words and she filled life into these :).Thank you again tulika…..

I have exams till 26th followed by my intership till 28th of the next month, so I don’t think I will be able to blog, miss me ok :), and when you do, send me an email :)

Take care….I’ll miss you all

Happy times are here again Part-2

Continuing from last week......

The next award is THE BINDAAS BLOGGER AWARD

This award goes for all the coolest guys out there, who just do one thing... BE COOL.... so without further delay....

The award goes to Arpitha Holla from ME-ing

Arpitha is cool, and as the award says, bindaas. She writes the smallest posts i have ever seen, and as small they are, they are just as cute. cho chweet.

She writes about stuff she loves in a very funny manner. Sometimes sarcastic, sometimes genuine, You will find all types of funny content here....not just that, she writes poem which are straight from the heart, and even though the words are simple, They are so emotional that you will feel them as you own...

Arpitha you deserve it... :).

The next winner is Arpit Rastogi from Notebook

This guys knows his cool. i mercilessly made fun of him when i wrote a comedy using his name for the central character, and yet he was completely cool about it (He just called me an ass hole, Dog, Bitch, and something else which i cannot say here..... :P) But.....

Arpit you are the most funnest guy i have ever known... i am so lucky to have found a friend like you. You write great and my fav post is one, where you say to your lecturer....

Marks ka kya karegi, marks ki lagadoon dheri.
Mai barish kardo marks ki, jo tu hojay meri...

Its my most fav line of all time on your blog.... you are the cool, the most awesome, blog buddy of mine :).Congrats...

and not just that pal, I like you blog layout very much so you also win BEST HANGOUT PLACE

The next award is THE CONSISTENCY AWARD

This award is given to the veterans out there, who just do one thing, be awesome ( I use that word a lot, Don't i? ;))

They were great when i first read them and get awesomer every time they write a new post. I am so very proud and so very very happy to have know them, with them i have grown a bond. A bond so deep, that i myself donno how much i care about them.

The first winner of this award is Anwesa(I call her mehek :)) from My life and times

Mehek you are very special to me, I remember every special moment in my life which has got created because of you.

I wrote my first acrostic because of you, i started writing short stories because of you, i became a better person because of you.

Your poems inspire me, talk to me, guide me, help me.... in so many ways that you cannot possibly imagine. You with your words build a spell, that I am awe struck every time mehek every time :).

I respect you for what you are, and every time i read you blog, i learn something new. Thank you for being there, not just as the reader of my blog, but also as a very dear friend of mine :).

The next winner is the chocolaty, natkhat, chubuli, sweetheart called Choco from Candid Talk

Choco...... when she writes, is not just fun. she is the funnest. Using her cute experiences, and soft hearted words, she can make your heart melt, and can make you smile like none other, she sometimes gives many of us (bad) surprises by going away and locking her blog along, and i have missed her for all that times she has gone. but beside all that she is the blogger who i adore.

Choco you have stood by on times when i needed someone the most,you might not remember but i do, thank you for being there, and thank you for supporting me when i was feeling down.your simple words have always have been like sunshine in my dark old days you are as your name suggests, chocolaty with a lot of heart :)

and here is a special award just for you

MOST AWESOME COMMENT AWARD

This award is given for the person who gives the greatest and most awesomest comment on my blog.... All of your comments are awesome but, the one Choco gave on one of my post, captured my attention and heart....i loved it choco :). So this award is just for you :)

The next winner of the consistency award is Qamrina Almas from Tales of a lunatic

Qamrina was one of the first followers of my blog, and from the day she joined, she has been the most loyal blog buddy of mine ;). its not just how her comments lift me up everytime, its about her emotions and how she puts them in words. Ah..mazing

You have to see her posts at her blog,she just doesn't write about herself,but about the things which can be changed for the better. She is one human being who is as unique as her name. Qamrina almas (A golden moon :))

QM you have been there for all my happenings (and miss happenings for that matter) I will always cherish you as my beloved friend :)

Coming up next is Vyas Vishwanathan from Vyazz sez

I think I can never quite sum up what Vyas is. He is as vivid as your imagination can be, as creative as the clouds in the sky, and as motivated as a train chugging towards its destination. He just believes in only one thing, to achieve his goals. No matter what :).

When you read his posts you feel immersed in it, and get a feeling you want the same thing too, may it be on the problems of this country, or buying your won island. When ved writes a blog post, its always different from the last one, he is a genius at what he does. (Don't think I am saying all this because he is a doctor from a Russian university, and I can get free checkups when he visits me ;)) honestly I have a deep respect for what vyaz does through his words, he like a magician who knows exactly what to give to his audience, what they would like, and what they would care about. Vyaz, hats off to you man... :)

Next is Harshita from Hasrhita's Chill Out Zone

Every time I read her, its a delight, absolute delight, she talks about things what matter to her in a way that affect you. (Confused. Read it again :P) every time you read her blog post, you will leave with a smile on your face. She fights for the bad things in the society, gives awareness about what we can to make it better, ultimately making us a part of the good thing we would rather not be a part of, because we are just plain old lazy, or because we just dont care.

Her words have the freshness of the morning dew, a glow like the morning sunrise, and beauty of a spring valley. She is a one good human being, and I am really very proud that I know her.

The final winner is Atmm from As The Mind Meanders

After scoring the most prestigious award last time(The Most Innovative Thinker Award) atmm was bound to do great things, but he scared everyone out of their wits when he announced retirement..i thought “So young and retiring already, is desh ka kya hoga bhai?.” There was just gloom in the blog world for sometime because there was no atmm.

But a couple of months later when he announced his return and wrote a story called Still,man, read that story and you will know what coming back with a bang is all about... simple words, rock solid narration,punchy climax. Brilliant.... I, choco and a couple of others were very very glad to see him back (Though I haven't read his new story :P, sorry man time crunch ;)) but atmm is one of the genius's out there, and I am really glad that I know him :)

The next award in the ceremony is MORE OF YOU WOULD BE AWESOME

This award is given to the bloggers who write once in a blue moon, and its very frustrating to see that, because these guys write like... like.... well cooked sushi :P (I know... its not a nice comparison, but hey.......where do you get well cooked sushi nowadays ;))

On a serious note, I gotta tell you, these guys rock, they just write a post once in 2 months or so, and every time they write its a delight to read them.

The winner of this award is Akanksha from Direct Dil Se

Akanksha... wow what to say about this girl, she knows the perfect way to blend work with play. Comes like rain in the desert, quenches the thirst of the eagerly awaited bloggers, goes away, while we stare in awe ;)

May it be her poems or her personal experiences, everyone is as unique and beautiful like the previous one she wrote

Akki we miss you yaar, please write more so that we can smile a lot more :).

The next winner is Manisha from Butterfly Thoughts

She is just like her blog name suggests, a butterfly, and has grown just like one too. She started out like a caterpillar and then turned into this beautiful butterfly, with magnificently colorful wings . She come very very rarely, but whenever she comes its so nice to read her posts.

Manisha ji, try to write as much as you can ji, cause we miss you ji :)

Next award in the ceremony is MOST FUNNIEST BLOG AWARD

As the name suggests, the award is for the funniest guys out there. They are awesome at their work, with their beautifully manicured hands(I'm guessing its true for the boys too ;)) they write such elegant pieces of funny material that you are in splits every time you read them. This award is for you guys

The first winner is Shanu from Fullon Bakwaas

Looking at her blog name you may get an impression saying the blog is exactly what its supposed to be, well you are not wrong :P, but besides saying about random things about herself shanu has shared some of the deepest thoughts in her blog. I read them and I was immediately awe struck by them. But besides some serious stuff that comes like like the rains twice a year ;), she is one funny girl. She can make anyone laugh with her 'Paneerchikitis'(her addiction of paneer and chicken dishes ;)) or sending a complete stranger to an even stranger location, even though she doesn't know the exact address. Shanu is awesome at what she does....making people laugh. So shanu this award is for you girl :)

Next is Arpit Rastogi from Notebook

Read his blog... Laugh like crazy...... have fun. I guess thats sums up arpit's blog.... he can make me laugh like none other, especially when he is drunk :P don't believe me, go check out for yourself ;)

Saale arpit....You scored 3 awards on my blog, making you the highest winner of awards in one session, not bad saale not bad at all. I gotta tell you, you have been a very very dear and funny friend (Pun Intended :P) of mine. Even though we have talked less I will always cherish you as an awesome(Thats like the 20^th time I have used the word :P) friend of mine. And I look forward to a friendship which will be across borders which we live. Come down any time to Mysore and you will have a royal welcome, I Promise :).

I gotta tell you once more yaar... you really really really are a........ lucky fellow, because you have me as your friend na isliye ;) take care :)

The final winner Hary from Cartoonists.

I have just started reading hary's blog, and whenever I read it, there is always a smile on my face. And his blog posts are so funny.... my god I have had stomach cramps ;), so hary. Here's one for you :)

Coming down to the final award of the 2 week long ceremony :P SWEET CANDY AWARD

This award is given to the most sweetest person out there in the blogosphere, the one who write posts even sweeter than honey.

The only winner of this award is Sulagna Chatterjee from Pink & black :)

Sulgana didi in her blog writes about her relationship with her husband, about how special it is to live everyday with someone you love, how great it is too get married. Looking at her makes me want to marry right now, though I mom may have a different opinion :P.

Sulagna didi is like the Elder sis I never had, after heera(My younger sister) passed away last year, I felt I will never have a sister again. But looking at sulagna didi, I have smile filled tears every time I read her blog, because I think, this is how my sister would be if she would have married.

In sulgana Didi I see my own sister. So this award is especially for the sweetness she spreads into the world through her blog :)

Sulagna didi, I don't know what I am to you, but for me, you are my big sis, and you can never run away from that responsibility. If I ask for pocket money, you gotta send it to me in courier ok ;)

Kidding aside, your blog posts are so special, it reminds me of my sis every time didi. I cannot tell you how happy I feel when you write about you and Gopal Jiju. I hope the 2 of you will have the most happiest of lives, and I pray to god, that not an ounce of sadness come into your lives. Ever.

So thats a long list of awards. I am tired.... like literally.... Hope you all are happy for the awards you got and who ever dint get the award.... don't worry, I am not cruel....... here is an award just for you :)

And if you all wondered why i showered you with all these awards... well. its the budday of my blog... My baby turned 3 this year... :)

Take care... have a nice week ahead :)

The Intelligence Concept

“Let’s go to mall…..” exclaimed my cousin Sam jumping up from the Divan he was lazing on "And do what, just browse the new products and come back empty handed!!” I replied
“Not exactly, we could buy a packet of Act 2 popcorn” he said
“That’s what we always do to save face….” I replied a little loud.

It was Sunday evening and I had nothing else to do, so just like teenagers (who are not teenagers anymore) we were watching reruns of Baywatch Hawaii. And frankly I was getting tired of the ‘only-girls no-story’ thing
I threw my glance around and found the newspaper lying beside me; I picked it up and saw an AD

The whole AD was in bright yellow with some little black words thrown in
“Why did god even make a color like yellow.. Uh…It’s above me” said EVIL M “Pun intended”.
I ignored the comment and took a closer look at the AD
It was from a clothes showroom named F square. The offer was

‘Sell your old clothes to us. Jeans for 400, T-shirts for 100, Shirts for 150’ conditions apply
I ignored the very very small fine print named conditions apply and thought

Hey that’s not a bad deal, I have some old jeans which I don’t wear, and a couple of very bright green T-shirts which I could give away “Don’t remind of those T shirts, they are like radium tombstones on a moonless night, why in god’s name did you even buy them?” asked EVIL M.
“Because I thought, at least that might attract girls” I replied
“They got attracted all right… to other boys” he replied laughing.
I got up from the divan to take a look into my closet and it was not a pretty sight.

Let me give you a description of my closet. I have 2 compartments where I keep my clothes, and they have everything, Besides Clothes there are socks, belts, caps, sweaters, baniyan’s and god knows what.
I mean there’s everything stuffed into those two compartments without any mercy (Don’t worry, I have separate place for my shoes ;)) When one sees it, they get the impression like each piece of garment is hugging another, just so that it doesn’t fall out of the closet.
In simple words it’s a typical guy’s closet. I searched for the old clothes and took them out. I looked at the Green T’s, one is a bearable color, when I took the other one out EVIL M said “Where are those sunglasses, Its hurting my eyes”
I looked at the Brand new Levi’s T shirt which I had worn only once, bought some 2 years back. It was good but it had 2 problems

One. It was extremely bright
Two. It was extremely short.

“Try it on once” said EVIL M. I tried it on and the T stopped just above my belly. Sam’s mobile just rang with its ringtone of the song ‘Belly Dancer’.
“Purrfect” purred EVIL M “Shake that ass now….” He laughed and sang along with the song.

I took out the shirt and then took a count of how many old clothes I had at that moment.
4 pairs of jeans and 2 shirts, I told the offer to my T.A bhabi and she searched my Bhai Riz’s closet and found a pair of jeans and a shirt, which she added to my collection.

Sam looked at me and said “Let’s be thoughtful for a minute here, we don’t know what the conditions of this offer are, you wanna take all these clothes at once?”
I was shell shocked when he said that, a guy who comes running to me wearing underwear, and exposing bellies, telling me to be ‘thoughtful’. That was like saying a blonde had won a noble prize.

But digesting that ‘thought’ I replied “Why not, we can sell these and get new ones from there itself, It would save a heck load of money, and I heard they have international brands such as Mark Taylor, Lacoste and all, It’s gonna be fun”.
“You have no idea how much….” replied EVIL M smiling a wicked smile
I knew I had to think at those thoughts of M but the offer was too good, so I went with my ‘better’ thoughts. Sam looking at the clothes bundle said “At least put those in your college bag”
“Why?” I asked
“Because it would be easy to carry, and there would be no embarrassment involved if the offer involves paying money” he replied
Point. I thought and packed all the clothes into the bag and pulled it over my shoulders, it was like pulling up a fat kid who had just eaten a hearty lunch. “Man this is heavy” I said.
“Ha ha you have no idea how heavy its gonna become” replied EVIL M smiling again

We got on a bus and reached the place, on the way I said “I also wanna buy an I-pod, so after this we will go to KT Street and get it OK”
“Yeah sure” he said

We went into the showroom, “First ask about the conditions, only then start opening your Potli (Bundle)” he had informed me while on the bus.

I browsed some T-shirts while Sam did the same, I then slowly walked to the sales guy and said “I saw the AD in the newspaper about the offer in your shop, can you tell me if there are any conditions towards it?”
“Yes sir, there is only one condition, for the amount of old clothes that you bring to us, you have to buy clothes costing 5 times more than that” he replied with a smile
“‘Service’ with a smile just got a whole new meaning” replied EVIL M “And oh yeah… pun intended, My own kinda pun of course” he said and started laughing.

I mentally calculated the price of my old clothes. 5 jeans amounting 2000 rupees, with a 2 T’s of hundred each and a shirt of 150, roughly making up to 2500 rupees. I was shocked, so shocked that there was release of adrenaline in my body, I calculated again, so that means I have to buy clothes worth 10 thousand rupees.(Stingy guy-10thousand bucks, you do the math ;))

EVIL M started laughing again, and it was just the start. I smiled at the sales guy and tuned towards Sam. He looked at my face and knew everything in a second, as he saw the monkey like fake smile on my face.(All this time, I was carrying the heavy bag mind you)
We talked and Sam asked “You got 10 thousand bucks…….”
“Only if you sell my kidney at a discount…..” I snapped
“Let’s get out then” he replied. I started browsing the T-shirts again and then amped my voice so that the sales guy could hear me, and said to Sam “These are all the same colors I have at home, you want anything?”
He shook his head; I asked the cliqued-customer-question to the sales guy “When will the new stock arrive?”
He gave the same cliqued-sales guy-answer “After 2 days”
We saw the opportunity and slipped out slowly.

I heard a laugh, it started out slow and then filled my whole head. It was EVIL M
He was laughing so hard I thought my brain would blow out. The monstrous weight of the bag on my shoulders and his laughing made for a deadly combination, and from the corner of my eye I even saw Sam laughing.
“It’s better than your belly dancing episode” I said.
“Yeah right” he replied laughing again.
We walked some more “At least carry this bag for some time” I pleaded with Sam
“Your ‘offer’, your weight. You wouldn’t have let me touch those new clothes if you had got them, Carry it yourself” he ordered.
I said “Atleast lets go search for the I-pod”, he agreed and we went I-pod hunting and that’s where the real trouble started.

I wanted a 2 GB I-pod costing no more than 1500 bucks and I specifically wanted a branded one, in specific it was a Sony or a Transcend.(Dream boy dream you would say, But hear me out ;))

We started searching at an electronic shop junction named KT Street which was a kilometer away from F square. We searched in more than 20 shops and in every shop the price range was 1900, but my friend had got one for 1500, so I dint wanna pay more.

We searched and searched to no avail, even a dealer of transcend electronics said “If you find a 2 GB model for less than 1500, order a hundred for me will you?”. I moved out of the shop smiling an embarrassed smile.
I was carrying that bag all this time and my shoulders hurt like hell, EVIL M and Sam were laughing in unison, I thought, ‘are these guys connected through some telepathic non sense?’, more laughter.

I was cursing myself, and then I remembered something, couple of weeks earlier I had gone to a computer dealer where my friend had a brought a new computer. When I had asked the dealer for the price of a Transcend I-pod, he had said “It’s 1500”
I asked EVIL M “Now you’re telling me this….”
“What fun would it be, if I had said that to you earlier” he replied laughing

I pulled Sam and told him about the shop and we started walking, it was some 1 and half kilometers away. In the heat of the night (its summer remember) and with no water in sight, I was sweating, sweating like a pig. I begged again to Sam to carry the bag and he rejected me outright.

We walked and finally reached the place, I enquired about the I-pod and the guy said “The price has gone up”
“How much?” I said
“A hundred bucks” he replied. I agreed, he went into the supply room and when he got back he said “Sorry, No stock.

All that walking, all that carrying, all that searching leading to this I thought, EVIL M and Sam were laughing like monkeys gone wild, I slowly came out of the store and started walking towards the bus stand.
“Man I haven’t had so much fun, since the last time when that girl kicked you in the shin when you were in 5^th standard” said EVIL M laughing.

I was still sweating; Sam said he would be going to a friend’s house and left me. I got on the bus and as the cold air washed through my face. I just had one thought. “Don’t ever try to be cheap, it’s gonna cost you more than you think.” And I have stopped being cheap. (No pun intended ;)) and so I have been feasting on 6 rupees cup ice cream thrice in a week now, not daily because I am not that rich ;).
And now I take a couple of minutes to seriously think whenever EVIL M says “Trust me….It will be so much fun…”.

Till next time.... Have fun guys ;)

A 'Girl's' day out ;)

Couple of Days back, for the first time in my life, I did a great achievement, I did something all the men dread to do, I did a thing that I am not so proud of, but still am, sort of ;), wanna know what it is????, Well........

I went shopping with a girl :P

I can already see your face expressions, guys would be laughing their asses off saying “Dude.........”, and girls would be thinking what's the big thing in that?, correct hai na..

About the experience what can say........, was it valuable? Yes. Was it good? Not so much, Was a lesson? Definitely yes ;).

It all started when my friend, 'D' told me, “I wanna buy a dress for my birthday” I was all enthusiastic, and I said “I would love to help” cause I never had gone for shopping with a girl, I had heard “rumors”(Read: Truth) that, it will be experience through hell and you will be crying at the end of the day, so whenever my frenz who were girls asked me to come shopping with them, I had always shied away from it, but my brain was frozen as I had eaten a lot of ice creams that day. So I agreed.

She said “I want to buy jeans this time” And I said “I know a nice place where I buy jeans, but they have also a girls section, so you can check it out”, she agreed, and when we reached the place, she suddenly saw a long line of shirts and started seeing through them, I saw her till she made a decision screening through almost 60 shirts and after trying a couple of them, she said she dint like any, and after I followed her out, she blamed me saying “There isint a nice thing there!!, what shop is that?, No nice selection itself!!” I said “ Ok baba, but why did you just browse through shirts, you said you wanted a jean right?”, she said, “Na I don't want one now, lets see if they have any salwars”, I agreed and went to another shop nearby, she browsed again, and said, not good, I agreed this time, cause the shop keeper was only showing BLUE dresses (He seemed like a huge fan of the film!!), So we went to another shop which she suggested.

Being 3 years in Mysore, this silly girl still doesn't know, which road leads to where, she asked me to guide her through(The just arrived guy :P), and some how I manged to get her to her shop, and that’s where the real torture started. She went in the shop, and the sales girl started showering us with salwars, literally.

She was selecting and I was repenting, for the decision, the sales girl picked many, but she dint like any, then the fed up sales girl said, “you only come here and decide”, she went beside the counter,. And started browsing, she would pick one and ask me, ok na?, good na?, I had to answer, that too faking a smile on my face, and after trying more than 6 dresses, she seemed to like one, but was still asking me, “Its good na, its good na?” when I said “Yes, its better than the rest”, she dint seem to agree, so she tried out 3 more dresses, and when finally some other customer pleaded, “Can you please lend me the room?, I have to reach home early today”, only then did she leave the changing room, and finally asking me 5 more times, she agreed to buy a dress, which I had earlier said yes too.

When we got out, I had sweat on my face, even though we were just coming out of an AC show room, so you can imagine what kind of situation I had to go through, but when she said “Birthday dress is the most special dress for me, thank you for the help” and smiled at me, I thought it was worth it. You know the difference in a guy's shopping and girls shopping is that girls buy with their heart whereas we buy with just money. I think that’s where we feel short, it’s the heart that matters and I think they got plenty of it.

Saying that I wish all my readers a very happy and prosperous diwali, have tons of fun, be smiling and be safe ok, take care :)

A Firefly dressed as Santa Claus :P

Guess what I am back to studying journalism :P

Remember couple of posts earlier I had said that i was denied a seat!! well I got it back...I know I know I sound like a firefly, saying “Now my ass is on fire, Now its not...........” :P, but the primary reason for this “firefly” act was that earlier I was trying for the government seat but now I am joining in by payment seat, i.e more than 85k. I know it doesn't sound a lot of money to you, but its a lot to me, my parents actually :P. so yes I am back onto chasing my dream. Again :D.

Well for this mistake(Read: Blunder) that I committed, I am not asking sorry from you guys :P, instead I am giving away gifts(how sweet of me na... ;))

I know Christmas is far away, but still gifts are always good to give right??, and anyways I love giving gifts, (Cause they are free, at least in the virtual world :P)

So here are some of the blogs which have changed my life, Literally, I mean the way these guys write is very addictive, literally, because every time I don't read these blogs, I feel like I am deprived of something(Read: Drugs), you guys are so awesome, I come online in between 3 or 4 days , because of my hectic(Read: Lazy) schedule,and when the day comes when I go online, I run and am out of breath when I reach the cyber cafe, Literally :D, and you should look at the puzzled look on the cafe owner's face, he might think I am mad or something, and I would say he is 72.86% right on that, 72.86% only though :P

And mind you these awards have been created by my own beautiful hands and are copyrighted, if anybody tries to steal them and pose them as their own, I will kick your asses, Literally No, Virtually Yes :P.

So my Drug dealers ;) here is the list of my favorite blogs which supply my favorite drug by which I live this gifted Life ;)

The list is continued from these posts link1 and link2

# 11 Blog to Change My Life : Harshita's Chill Out Zone

Awesome is just an understatement for this blog, I mean she is the one person I would trust my life on, Sometimes I cant figure out what is she, human? or superhuman?, If superman was a woman and had an Indian version of it I think harshita would be it, her writing is more powerful than sunny paaji's dhai kilo ka haath, cause when she writes about social injustice, it makes you feel bad, not just about the person or situation, but about yourself, thinking why cant I do something about this?? even after reading her blog post it will linger in your heart and, it will always be reminding you, be good dude, be good (at least today), and when she writes about her life, you wouldn't wanna miss it for the world, because your every worry will go away when you read it, its so.., I mean its so very good..

Lesson learnt about life from the blog: Live life to the fullest, But never ever forget your responsibility, and help someone, whenever you can.

Awards Given: A)

B)

#12 Blog to Change My Life: As The Mind Meanders

This guy knows his cool, I mean cool can be his middle name, whatever I mean Whatever he writes is so awesome that you are left with a feeling which says “Damn why cant I write like this guy??” and his readers will vouch for that, believe me, everything he writes is so very innovative that awesomeness oozes out of his writing. I mean just give him a picture and you will have a story in no time and that too in such a unique way that you are left spell bound when you read it, yes I know its hard to believe, but its true all right, when I read his blog it taught me that an open mind is far more capable than a bound one. So....

Lesson learnt about life: Let the MindMeander Dude, Let it just Meander ;)

Award Given:

#13 Blog to change my life: The Other Perspective

Genius is the least that he can be called, I mean he has more potential that a Nuclear Bomb,(his head is normal though, I don't know how) Innovation and creativity are at its best in his writing. Because its unique in its own ways, its strong and its hard to believe, because you wont be able to believe and will just think “can somebody write so good?”, and you will be hitting your fist to your head more than a couple of times asking only one question over and over again which is “Now why didn't I think of that??”, the stories he writes are so powerful that after you read them you will feel like you have been hit by Mike Tyson himself, really shocking stuff, real good stuff. According to me his winning formula is only this 'Think Unique-Think some more-Write-Achieve', and thats what exactly I too will be working on from now on.

Lesson learnt about life: Think Think and think some more

Award Given:

#14 blog to change my life: Viva Forever

Keshi. Ah the name itself is enough. She is the most humane human I have ever seen in this so mean of a world. She is so pure hearted that I think by just with her one touch she can even make flowers blossom in a barren dessert, her words are like small drops of heaven which make me feel blessed every time I read them, everything she writes is so emotional and so touching towards your life that you will feel “how come she is living my life?” , you will relate to her life so very much.
She is a really amazing person, I mean amazing doesn't even describe her, you know she is basically from Srilanka working in America but she has a sponsored child in Srilanka, she just doesn't send her money for the child's caring, but even writes personalized letters, buys clothes and does everything to make the child happy, even though she is so far away, who in the world does that nowadays??, people don't have time for themselves and in these times she cares for him and not just for him but for every person who cares for her, she is so good that even if you don't like her(only reason could be you are Satan), she with her care will make you to forget that and make you love her for what she is, I mean if I start writing I will run out of words and still wont be able to make justice as to how much of a true hearted person she is, her words are my inspirations, I was a mess one time, but when I read a post of her about how to find love in yourself, I have been a much much better person now, all thanks to her, I mean I just cannot thank her enough for writing, for making me feel belonged, for being always there, I just wanna thank god for making me come across her blog and making me to get to know her, if I now run into bad situation or get depressed for some reason, I think from keshi's preceptive and even though the problem might not be solved, fighting it becomes a whole a lot easier, I just wanna say “keshi the biggest change in my life was brought by you, I owe everything to you for that, and whenever you need me (or even if you don't need me :P)I will be always there for you, its my promise now and it will be my promise forever.”

Lesson learnt about life: Life is a BIG mess, Just be patient and sort it out and it will be the most beautifulest thing ever.

Award Given: A)

B)

C)

OK those were the blogs that changed my life, but the coming blogs supply the best medicine known to man. Laughter.

Miss Kido

when I first read her blog, I was so impressed that I literally wanted to say Ma kido devi ki jai :D, I mean she knows funny and believe me I have read couple of funny blogs(no pun intended) and they are no way close to her, she with her striked word lines can make anyone laugh, and in just a matter of minutes I was her fan already, at that moment itself i read all her posts, and I gotta tell you I was literally on floor laughing, not just me when I showed her posts to my cousin brother it was the repeat of my floor situation, and he rarely laughs mind you, so I just wanna say, “Kido your writing makes me forget my worries and makes me feel better every time I read your blog, thank you for that and lemme tell you, your advice rocks :D”

Award Given:

Chronicwriter
The more I say about this guy the less it is, I mean he the funniest man I have ever read, his stories, his one liners are always and I mean always great to read, he writes about his life(mostly lies) and as much as they are funny it leaves a sensitive edge which the readers tend to hang on to, by which they are forced into dilemma as to whether its true or false?, he also has and alter ego, who is more cool than the author chriz itself, his posts always have a point to prove and he proves it in the most funniest way possible, he is the motivation for me, by which I became a lil more funny and lil more 'less serious' in my life, I mean You the man chriz, you the man. ;)

Award Given:

and for the guys who dint make it on the list, here is an award for you too

The(fake)Award given: (see I can be generous too :P).

Congrats to all the winners, hope you all liked your surprises, till next time god bless, take care......